Live Wholeheartedly

Well, well. Here I am, again. Once again feeling like I owe someone an apology for being so neglectful of this space. Myself, more than anything. Because this is my space, a space I carved out for me, to come and unload whatever is on my mind - and there has been A LOT on my mind. It would help for me to come here, purge my thoughts...but I just don't make the time for myself to do it. That is a shame, and something I deeply need to rectify. I tend to internalize my feelings way too much...which would come as a surprise to some, since I talk so much. I just tend to not let people peek into the dark and twisty of it all, most of the time. Not that I want to only be dark and twisty here (can you tell I love Grey's Anatomy? I'm so unoriginal!), and not that all my hidden feelings ARE that way. I just have a lot to say, and usually I have deep ongoing conversations with myself in my head...I just wish I could motivate myself to log in and type those thoughts out here. It might be mostly boring, but sometimes it can get pretty interesting in there.

So, at least I can console myself that this time it has not been over a year since my last post. Is that sad or what, to congratulate myself on it only being 8 months?? Or, closer to 9 really but who's counting? But again, as last time, many things have happened over the last year.

First and foremost, our adoption is STILL not yet final. More snags, this time all to do with the state not having filed for my son's SSI back years ago when they should have. He is autistic, and was supposed to already have been approved for SSI, which automatically qualifies him for federal adoption assistance. Unfortunately, that never happened even though it was marked in his file that it did - and if you know anything about the government and disability, you know it takes forever (plus one day for good measure) to get anything approved as far as that is concerned. So we waited...and waited. Fortunately or unfortunately (you can look at it both ways), our 3 youngest have been in the foster system for 5 years as of November 9th, and once kids are in the system for a consecutive 5 year period, they automatically qualify for federal assistance. So on November 9th, we went ahead with the adoption without waiting for the SSI approval. We were worried that our promise of adoption in 2011 would once again prove to be untrue...but alas...with a wonderful caseworker and adoption attorney on our side - everything was pushed through VERY quickly, and we have our adoption hearing on December 9th!! It will be a VERY Merry Christmas this year! FINALLY! Our kids will legally be ours. No more monthly visits, no more different last names causing odd looks...FINALLY! My Facebook friends better watch out on December 9th, because that afternoon 2 years of memories I haven't been able to share with them, oh how they will be shared now (insert scary laugh here)!

Another thing I want to talk about is my dad's cancer. It's been a long road this year for my dad, but finally he is feeling better. Thank God above, he can enjoy -truly enjoy - the holidays this year. He is not feeling sick, in fact is feeling better than he has in a long time. This isn't due to some miracle cure, sadly, but at least a temporary miracle nonetheless. You see, he had a bone marrow transplant this summer. It was a hard process for him - I can't go into details because for one, it was so much a blur of scary but also...it's still hard to think about all he went through. But at any rate, it was done, weeks in the hospital and months afterward of feeling bad...but I am glad to say he is now in remission. We don't know how long, and quite frankly, I don't want to know. I just want to enjoy it. I won't forget about the cancer or the prognosis, it will still be there lurking in the back of my mind...but I think seeing my dad looking healthy and feeling good again - and happy because he's feeling good - will help me to not thing predominantly about the "C" word, and just be able to enjoy the time we spend with him.

Amidst all that was going on with my dad this summer, and actually WHILE he was in the hospital recovering from the bone marrow transplant, we lost a very special part of our family. My husband's grandmother, or Nonnie, as we called her. Words can't express what she meant to me and she deserves more than just a paragraph in this update, so I will save that conversation for later...but losing her has left a strikingly large hole in our lives.

Obviously there has been a lot more go on in the last year than those few things, but those are the "big" things that have weighed on my mind over the last year.

On a happier note, although I don't want to rush what is left of this year since we are now in the midst of my very favorite time of the year, I am looking forward to what I just know will be a FABULOUS year for my family. We already have many things in motion that will happen in 2012, and being that it is the first year we will start out as a full, complete family (legally anyway), I think that sets the tone for a year with good things on the horizon. I don't want to jinx myself, but it does look like (praise God!) financially things are going to be looking way, way up for us next year. There is also a vacation to Hawaii in the works...and I am hoping to be able to get back to discuss that more in depth later. It's something we're so excited about...the trip of a lifetime for us that has been a 'dream in the works' for over 14 years now.

So at that, I would love to say "stay tuned"...but I don't want to leave you hanging on promises that may not come to be. But hopefully, you will see a lot more from me in the coming year.

Love and peace,
Mariah

Posted in: Adoption, blogging, cancer, Death, Faith, Family, finances, Foster Care, Prayer, vacation on Tuesday, November 29, 2011 at at 7:51 AM 1 comments    

This first idea...altered Starbucks Frappucino bottles...is one that is on my list to make for teachers, co-workers and our neighbors next year. Usually I do baked goods/candies for both our neighbors and teachers, but since I am swearing off most of my usual Christmas baking next year (a little sadly, because I do love it...but for good reason), to make it a little less stressful while getting ready for both Christmas and a vacation to Disney - these will fill in quite nicely, I think. Still homemade, unique and heartfelt :) Plus, we usually take our neighbors their gifts on the morning of Christmas Eve...since we'll not be there Christmas Eve I was trying to think of something we could give a week before that they would be able to enjoy in the week leading up to Christmas...I saw an idea on another blog using these for a hot chocolate gift "basket". The best thing is that although I won't want to fill the jars too far in advance, I can have them all decorated up and ready to fill wayyy ahead of time, so that all I have to do before I hand them out is fill the jars, which shouldn't take any time at all! I am also thinking of using the same idea but changing it up a little to be some sort of 'pamper' gift...something like homemade milk bath in one bottle, bath salts in one and shower scrub in the 3rd...then maybe leaving the 4th jar out and putting a scrubbie or something in the 4th section? Come to think of it that might make a good teacher gift instead of the hot chocolate...hmmm! Things to think about. I will have to figure out exactly who will get what kind before I decorate them but I have already started collecting the 4-packs of Frap drinks for this project. Who knows...while working on them the creative juices might get flowing and give me even more ideas for others on my list.

Here is a pic of the one another blogger made:

This cute set was made by http://pixelsnpaper.blogspot.com/. What an adorable inspiration!!

Another idea I am working on for my Sister in Law and her Hubby is an altered Family Scrabble Board. It will look something like this, although with different wording and their last name will be the "center" word that I build the other words off of:

Unfortunately, I saved this picture a long time ago and do not remember where I got it to give credit to the creative person who made this - but whoever/wherever you are - thank you for the beautiful idea!!

So far that is all I've found that I'm working on...except making fleece sleepmasks and pajama pants for my 4 kids that are Disney themed...I don't have any pictures of inspiration on those yet though because I haven't looked for patterns/ideas yet. I just know it's something I will be doing. I will post other ideas and pictures of my finished projects as I come up with them.

God bless and Happy New Year!
Mariah

Posted in: Being Frugal, Budgeting, christmas, Family, friends, holidays, vacation on Wednesday, December 30, 2009 at at 8:13 AM 0 comments    

I sit here at my computer, thinking about my blog and realizing it was almost this exact same time last year that I thought starting a blog back up was a great idea. Now here it is...a year later...and I've made a seriously pathetic number of posts so far. I started this blog as a way to remind myself to be motivated, be creative, be inspired...maybe even to help keep my goals. I still want this blog to represent that...and everything about life that I love so much - God, family, home, writing, crafting - living my life to the fullest. Enjoying every moment and hoping that I make the people in my circle feel as blessed as they make me feel.

There are reasons...or excuses...as to why I have neglected to post - we really have had a very busy and very productive (!) year. We went from a family of 3 to a family of 6 almost overnight. That all started about mid-year...right after we were licensed to be foster parents. We started on the fostering journey thinking eventually we might adopt a child, maybe even two that came into our care along the way. That all changed pretty suddenly when 3 little blessings came our way, and the only way I can describe how it all happened is that it was meant to be...pre-destined, pre-determined...God's plan for our life. Everything that happend was simply too unbelievable, too coincidental to have happened by some happy accident. These 3 kids were meant to become a part of our family, from the very beginning...all roads have led us here. I know this. So...now our happy little family of 3 is a happier, larger (and of course, busier) family of 6. The 4 kids we always dreamed of but knew we could never have...well now we have them. Life is good, God is amazing.

So now, here I am...seemingly back to where I started. Right after Christmas, vowing next Christmas I will be more prepared, ready ahead of time and have made most of our family gifts. That didn't happen for this Christmas - but I am even more determined than ever to make that happen next Christmas. I realized this Christmas just how hectic it is and how fast it goes with 4 kids...so much faster than it went with just our daughter. I think I took for granted her first 11 Christmases, the calm, the time we were able to spend together just enjoying the season. Things sure went differently between work, therapy appointments, doctor appointments, shopping for more gifts than I've ever imagined buying for one occassion. And although next year we will also be busy, decidedly so, at Christmas...that is pushing me even more to vow that I will be 95% ready for Christmas by December 1st (5% reserved for baking which can't really be done that far in advance, haha). The reason we need to be ready so early? Because over the week of Christmas, to celebrate the first Christmas after finalizing the adoptions, we will be on a family vacation to Disney World! I am so excited about that...and want everything to go smoothly. The first 5 days of vacation will be spent at the parks, and the last 2 relaxing and enjoying each other. We plan to drive to the coast and spend Christmas Eve watching the sun set over the Gulf. So you see...I really do need to be more organized, more productive and more prepared for 2010. I have set several goals and I am hoping that I can see most of them to fruition.

Goals for 2010
Lose 5lbs (or more) per month
Continue to pay down debt
Save for and plan Disney Christmas Vacation
Work on Christmas gifts for 1 'family' ('family' here means any set group of people, ie teachers) on our list each month
Have all Christmas gifts made or bought by December 1, 2010

I will have to get creative and really push myself to make sure I meet these goals...usually I rely heavily on home-made goodies (candies, cookies, etc) as gifts for friends, family and teachers - however having to have all things made by December 1st that really will limit food gifts this year. I will still probably do a few things but I want December to mainly be un-scheduled and un-stressful, so I won't be doing very many food-gifts at all. I have come up with a few ideas though - I have a really neat idea for my Sister in Law and her husband...a "Family Scrabble Board" where you take and alter a scrabble board with scrapbooking supplies and use the tiles to spell out their names, and words that symbolize 'family'. I think it will be really neat. I also found an idea for altering Starbucks 4-pack Frap bottles...you can do so many things using scrapbooking supplies and a little paint and ribbon, they turn out so cute. I have seen ideas for hot cocoa gift sets using those (two bottles filled with hot cocoa mix, one with marshmallows, and one with peppermints) which is something I'm definitely planning on doing...the only thing I would have to do *after* December 1st on those would be add the marshmallows (wouldn't want to add them too early and have them get stale or clumpy...eww). I also make a killer chai tea mix so I am thinking I could come up with some ideas along those lines also, just have to figure out what to package with it. Maybe just some festive store-bought christmas candies? The one other idea I am excited about is making fleece pajama pants. I am definitely making them for my 4 kids, my SIL's 4 kids and also my cousins 3 kids. I might even think about making them for some adults on our list. I have tons of ideas saved in a folder in my e-mail, so I will be going through those over the next month or so to see if there are any good things to add to my list also. I'm pretty excited about this right now...I just hope that I can stay this excited/motivated about it! If I can, then I'm sure I will be more than ready for Christmas 2010 and our Disney Vacation well ahead of my December 1st goal :)

I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas. For me, although hectic and crazy, and except for a few not-so-great moments, it was one of the most wonderful Christmases yet.

God Bless and have a happy and SAFE New Year!
Mariah

Posted in: Adoption, Being Frugal, blogging, Budgeting, christmas, Faith, Family, Foster Care, friends, holidays, Prayer, Shopping, vacation on Monday, December 28, 2009 at at 8:47 AM 0 comments    

Obviously there has been a lack of activity on this blog for a while. It isn't that I have nothing to say - I have a lot to say...just very little time lately in which to say it.

I don't want to jinx myself by saying too much...but things are looking interesting on the foster/adoption front :) We are approved, and have been contacted about a sibling group that is up for adoption...we should know more in a week or so (I hope)!

On all other fronts, it's summer - so of course life is busy :) Weekends have been full of family, friends and lots of fun...weekdays have been full of work, work and more work (and a little fun thrown in for good measure!). Getting ready for school to start up again, getting the foster room finished...which it almost is! The interior is completely drywalled, taped & mudded...it's just waiting for a coat of primer and then paint. I am hoping to get to that Sunday (we'll be out of town this weekend, visiting the sibling-in-laws for my nephew(aka baked bean)'s birthday. My neices and nephews are all beans :) There's Kidney Bean, Baked Bean, String Bean and Pinto Bean, and they all fit their bean nicknames quite well in their own little way :) My sweet beans ;)

Speaking of the siblings-in-law...or my brothers sister & family if you rather...we have decided recently that we are going to take our 2 families on a Magical Family Christmas Vacation in 2010! Where, you ask? Well, of course, the only place magical enough to spend Christmas away from home - Disney World!! So, lookout Magic Kingdom...we'll be invading your village in about 16 months...give or take a few weeks :) Color me excited! I have already started perusing the Disboards, and creating our trip planning binder. Oh, and of course, getting some great tips on saving money for Disney over at Couponing to Disney! She's amazing!! So far our family has about $35 in savings so far (saving our change only) for the World...not too shabby considering we still have almost a year and a half to go - and that we're not 'officially' starting the saving until next year!

Ok - I think that's all for now! See ya real soon :)
Mariah

Posted in: Adoption, Being Frugal, Budgeting, christmas, Family, Foster Care, holidays, vacation on Thursday, August 6, 2009 at at 12:14 PM 0 comments